the most wonderful time of the year

Winter is quickly ushering its way into our lives! We just had our first snowfall! Now, I know it only lasted about 10 or 15 minutes with itty bitty snowflakes but I loved every second of it. Good things can happen this time of the year. Everybody is just a little bit different and I love it. I'm a huge romantic so forgive how this statement reeks of romantic energy but... snow makes everything more magical. I heard that somewhere once and I think I agree with it. And I don't think there's anything wrong with thinking so. I prefer to be optimistic and hope for the best, whether that always happens or not is another story.

I need to remind myself to keep that hope and optimism. The past month has been a bit of a struggle with trying to find a new job since I left my old one. Some say I should have found a new one before I left the old, but that's just not how it happened and I think that was for the best. God has used this time that I haven't been working for a lot of good things and I'm so grateful for that! I've been able to spend more time with my older sister and strengthen our relationship as well as be around my baby niece! I love her so much and it's been so exciting watching her grow up! More importantly though, God has taken full advantage of this time to grow me more and more in Him. Afterall, He knew ahead of time this time was coming for me and dare I say He planned it this way?? I think I do! I can honestly say that I'm not the same person I was when I graduated college or even started my first job out of school. The Lord has taught me so much about Himself, and myself, since then. It's been a lot to swallow, but absolutely wonderful. I've always had a hard time understanding His love for me and that it's something that will never go away. I don't feel good enough. Well, that's probably because I'm not good enough, but that's the point. I haven't been able to get around that fact and it has held me back for far to long. Enough is enough. God's love for me has nothing to do with me, other than the amazing truth that He has chosen me to be the undeserving object of that grace-abounding love. I think I'm starting to understand this (as much as possible anyways) and just accept it rather than fight it. And to be honest, just accepting this has freed me up a lot! I am so happy right now and I haven't been able to say that in a really long time. I am content with where I am! Yes, I look forward to things to come (job, new apartment, etc.) but I'm overjoyed at what He's doing in my life right now. He has brought new people in my life whom have challenged me in the deepest parts of my faith and that has been so refreshing. God has brought me those people in the strangest of ways, but I'm learning more and more that, that is often how He operates. Thank you Lord for your unexpected blessings!

So, even though I can't find a job and the finances will run dry eventually, I must remember to keep my eyes on the Lord and look heavenward. It's the most wonderful time of the year right now and I'm happy! I'm not going to let the aforementioned things distract me from where God has so graciously placed me.

Bring on the snow!